Coming Clean

    My credit card debt is $10,989.
    That's down from my all time high of about $16,000 two years ago.

    Don't celebrate yet.
    I haven't been totally honest about my financial life.

    I'm not doing too great.

    By that I mean that I am not making good choices. They are small choices, but they are thwarting two things that are the most important things to me right now: being out of debt and being married to my guy.

    Like I said, they're little things. For one thing, love my laptop, but it was $1,250... and I charged it. Why? I didn't have that kind of cash to spend on one thing.

    That's bad Personal Finance 101.

    For another, my guy and I didn't foresee how badly his job search in TN was going to go. Perhaps instead of saving for a big expensive wedding, I should have used the money we saved in the seven months he was here to hammer away at my debt. I'd owe about $8,000 right now. A considerable difference and one that would have made my cc debt free by 30th birthday goal attainable.

    And, frankly, I didn't do what I'm always telling y'all to do: have a realistic, measurable, achievable plan!!! Underneath all my counting, spreadsheets and calculations I was still doing phantom math. I still didn't have a discernable goal. My debt repayment plan was a lot of "if this, then maybe that I hope" instead of "I need to this first followed by this, and then this to make sure I put down this much and pay it off within this many months."

    I appreciate all of you sticking with me through this journey. I appreciate the pats on the back and I appreciate the advice. I'm not a total slacker, but I just couldn't pretend that I had it all together when I totally don't.

    All right. I'll be spilling my guts all week, so those of y'all wiser than me, please feel free to share wisdom, chastisements, and step-by-step instructions for your wayward sister who is trying REALLY hard to get it all straight.

    As a wise PF blogger friend told me, it's not enough just to HATE debt, I have to have a good plan to eliminate it.

    I'm working on it. Sometimes I'm really good and sometimes I fall off. But we get back up, right? Yeah

    DH

Comments

[Les]

I'm going to email you after school - I found something that might make the difference for you. And truthfully, I owe you this, because if it hadn't been for you and YOUR emails to me, I would not be where I'm at right now.

This is fixable and its easier than you think.

[Clink]

Hang in there, girl. Yup, we all fall off the wagon sometimes. For me, the trick is figuring out why I fell off and what I need to do to get back on. Not always so simple as redoing the budget. It usually takes a reevaluation of my goals and expectations and what I am realistically going to do to achieve it.

You'll get to where you need to go, your road is just a bit windy right now.

[D]

Wow - huge come clean! I think that we all do things like this, although we don't all admit to it. Admitting to it puts you in a more mature place to understand and defeat.

I think you have many good ideas to help with a turn around. Ideas that are realistic. Such as a roommate.

I, personally, feel 2 women in one house is a battle. Maybe it is because I am a power horder???? I told you before I have issues. I would probably look for a man, but then again - with your guy out there, it wouldn't be worth the possible upset. After all, I wouldn't want my guy living with a gal. Again a power issue?

Even with my issues, a roommate would be the best plan. Splitting those bills in 1/2 and putting the freed up 1/2 to your debt will help to put you back on track.

What ever you decide, don't worry, be diligent and it will all work out, as it should. It is only money.

[Chitowngirl]

Nobody's perfect DH! If you put one foot in front on the other and make progress, you are better for it. There will always be times of shoulda, woulda, coulda for everyone but you can't negate that you made progress and you still deserve a pat on the back and encouragement to press on and meet your goals. In the end, we tend to be the only person standing in our way. Stay positive!!!

[3 Things About Money]

Thanks for coming clean! It is the first step always in debt elimination. We've all been there, and me, I was there yesterday. I just haven't left the house yet or I be there again. It is a slow process to do all this and you know, "progress not perfection". You are an inspiration to me. thanks.

[Lua]

Hey we all make mistakes...at least you are admitting them. Now that you know what you are doing wrong you can take steps to correct those errors. Keep up the fight against debt..you will succeed!

[Ms. Molly Golightly]

First, I want to say your blog is one of my favorites. And that's because you are honest and real and readers can relate to you on a personal level. You don't get that with many personal finance blogs. Second, don't be so hard on yourself. Debt elimination takes time and patience. It can't be accomplished overnight, otherwise everyone would be debt free. You're on the right path and we're all here for some moral support when you need us.

[mapgirl]

Hey! There's a reason why Catholics like me like confession! :-)

Acknowledging the problem is the first step, right?

Hop to it. Your rational brain knows what to do. I don't have to tell ya.

Let's talk some more offline. I've got some ideas for you!

[NCN]

Hey DH,
Do I have a bone to pick with you!!!
(Just kidding... but it would be cool if you could change the link to the network. I've dropped the blogspot and now it's just www.ncnnetwork.com)

It's good that you "came clean", but you might be being to hard on yourself. You are down over 5K since you started, and you've had some MAJOR life changes...

Re-group, re-start, and re-energize. You (still) rock!

NCN

[Single Ma]

Don't be so hard on yourself. Brush ya shoulders off and get back to work. I'm here for ya. :-)

[Sense]

now, you are even more deserving of the 'role model' comment i have on my blog about you! for one thing, i admire your honesty. also, you seem to have a very positive attitude, and attract good and loving people in your life, and that speaks volumes about your character. you've come so far already! don't despair. if it's important to you (um, yeah, you have a BLOG about it, i'd say that qualifies), you'll get there eventually.

we are all just doing the best we can. NOBODY has it together ALL the time.

[gmv]

Dear DH:

I've been chipping away at my debt since early 2005, and can't tell you the number of times I've fallen short of the plan. For example, in 2005 I took two vacations (of the airplane variety) and in 2006 I went to Las Vegas for a very spendy weekend. Charged it all. AFTER I had entered into doing the Dave Ramsey "Use No Credit Again Ever" plan. And that's just the tip of the iceburg.

I've still managed to pay off over $18K, although irritatingly I've added probably another $8K. Still, I'm hoping to get everything paid off in 2007.

Just hang in there!